Monday, May 30, 2011

Under Armor

In Ephesians 6 we are told, "be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand."

I often get a little nervous the night before it's my turn to take over a dorm of little boys at Casa Hogar Douglas for the day so the full-time worker can take a day off. Honestly, the nights before, I don't usually sleep too well. The other night, I was prepping "lesson plans" of sorts like a teacher to be ready for the day to come and honestly just had to sit back and giggle at how franticly I tried to throw everything together and think through all the possible scenarios for the following day.

"What board games will Israel ask me to play with him?"

"Who am I going to give a hair cut to? Where are my clippers?"

"Children's vitamins?"

"Kids' movies? What will we watch before going to bed? Where is my other DVD player?"

"Children's books -- I need to switch up my stack and get some good ones."

"Will I let the older boys play my N64 after they read? Where is my extension cord?"

"Are the puzzles packed? Will we play with the train set? Are the legos in my car? Maybe we'll have time to play with play-doh before the big kids get home?"

"I wonder if the boys have anymore shampoo or toothpaste? I should bring some just in case."

I do this every night before I go - mentally go through my check list of what "tools" I need to successfully make it through the day with the boys. I realized all my stuff is like I'm suiting up for battle - and I dress for some kind of workout. But it doesn't matter what kind of dri-fit or under armour T-shirt I'm wearing if I've haven't taken the time to put on God's armor. I find myself praying very seriously and desperately as I drive over in the mornings to wake the boys up and get them ready for school.

Ephesians 6 continues in verse 14 with - "Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place and your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints."

I read this and think, "sounds like I'm supposed to be ready for battle eh? Really? What kind of battle? If I'm comfortable, am I missing something?" I've told several people this before - but part of what attracts me to wanting to take care of dorms full of very special and difficult little orphan boys for a full day at a time by myself is that it's probably the most difficult thing I've ever done in my life. I'm not naturally good at it. It does NOT come easy and for whatever reason I'm drawn to it. It forces me to get up against a wall and beg God to show up and to help me and to calm me down and break up fist fights between 4 year olds who can easily give someone a bloody nose. It's a battle. At the end of the day, I honestly feel it. I'm exhausted, I'm worn out, I often cry. Some days, I think I spend more of my time telling kids that I'm sorry for getting mad at them and yelling after I caught them beating up another child - that I'm sorry for raising my voice in the heat of the moment or that I'm sorry if I scared them with how angry I was at their violent reactions to each other (ironic huh?). Or when a child is driving me nuts, you will often hear me say out loud in English to a child something like, "you sweet blessing of the Lord." It's a reminder to me - that this crazy child is a blessing from God and shouldn't be viewed as annoying when they do something awful.

At the end of the day - like it says in Ephesians 6:13, I want to have already put on the "full armor of God so that after I have done everything, I can stand." It is easy to be loving, patient, calm and nurturing when you are rested, not melting to death from 110 + degree heat, dealing with one child at a time, feeling appreciated or like anyone is listening to you. If you're a mom of lots of small kids, you know - when is your day like that? Never? I realize that the absolute last thing that the enemy wants for my sweet Douglas boys is to have a calm, chaos free day where the few workers that are around are freed up to have one on one conversations with them, love of them, and adequately encourage them. Try reading stories about how much God loves these children to one half your dorm when the other half has broken out into an all out brawl over a lego man that they can't seem to share. It's a battle.

We are in a battle. The enemy roars around like a lion trying to take Christians out - make us useless. We gotta go on the offensive and take the enemy out. What is my weapon besides a really good Disney movie that my boys haven't seen before??? The word of God -- scripture. I need a reminder everyday - God is the hope here. His word, biblical truth - that's my weapon. When a little boy is in time out, my weapon against violence is scripture reminding them about who they are in the Lord's eyes. I need God's armor - the Holy Spirit to give me love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, righteousness, and self control to these boys.

Please pray for me but more importantly, pray for the workers in the children's homes that Back2Back is associated with to be daily covered in God's armor to love these children. Some workers names from Douglas -- Jose, Lorena, Mary, Javier, Panchita, Adrian, Isabel, Irma, Katy, Lorena

1 comment:

Jim and Betty said...

You are a Warrior! And I am proud to call you friend!